Archives for September 2019

A Father Will Do Anything for His Family

September 29, 2019 by admin Leave a Comment

A Father Will Do Anything for His Family

One family funeral was almost followed by a another the next day.

My friend’s father-in-law passed away from the dual demons of cancer and heart disease. The man met the challenges of outrageous career ending financial devastation, followed by severe, painful medical problems, with inspirational grace and courage.

My friend was honored to be chosen by the deceased’s family members to give the homily at his funeral. My friend and his family attended his father-in-law’s wake the entire Sunday before the funeral. He attempted to remember the significant personal stories of the various friends & relatives to support the essence of his eulogy the next day.

After everyone left, late at night, my friend, his wife, and 2 young children began their hour-long trip home. Exhausted, his family was fast asleep in the car. His wife in the front passenger seat; and his son & daughter lying on the back-bench seat (Before child-safety restraint Laws) The last 2 cups of coffee kept my friend’s eyes open.

Fortunately, there were no cars on the expressway. A few miles from home, my friend was driving in the middle lane, when he noticed a car parked on the right emergency lane. That car put its lights on as my friend passed it. (My friend wasn’t speeding, so it wasn’t a cop.) But, when my friend looked into his rear- view mirror, he saw that the car was accelerating at a high rate of speed, towards him.

My friend stepped on the gas. The other car went faster. My friend knew this part of the expressway very well. He knew that the next off-ramp, past the one coming up, was 8-mles down the road. As he was almost past the near exit ramp, my friend slammed on his brakes, and made a sharp right turn onto the curving exit ramp. His wife lurched forward, safely restrained by her seat-belt. The 2 kids in the backseat flew against the cushioned back of the front seat. Everyone was screaming. No one was hurt. Fear filled the car.

Thankfully, he saw the car following him speed past that exit ramp. However, a few moments later, he looked in his rear-view mirror and saw that the other car was backing-up on the expressway, to come down the same curvy exit ramp. Now, my friend’s mind was racing. Only a crazed maniac would back-up on an expressway. He knew that the nearest police station was several miles away. He knew that he couldn’t elude the crazed driver stalking him. So, he pulled into the well-lit gas station at the bottom of the exit ramp, in front of the door to the store.

Instinctively, my friend knew that he couldn’t let that crazed driver approach his car with his family inside. So, he got out and stood far away from his car. The crazed driver got out of his car and faced my friend, like a gunslinger in an “Old West Movie Shoot-Out Scene”, and said,
“I’m a man.”

My friend said, “I’m a man.”

The crazed driver said, “You’re a man.”

My friend said, “You’re a man.”

The crazed guy got back into his car, made a right turn onto the city street, and sped away. It was over. My friend didn’t know what the crazed driver was “On”, or was going to do. He just knew that whatever it was, he wanted it to happen far away from his family.

When things calmed down, he hugged his family, explained what happened. He reassured them that nothing nor no one would ever hurt them. He told them that a father will do anything to protect his family. When they got home, he spent a little longer tucking everyone into bed, including his wife. He waited until everyone was asleep.

Then, he thanked God that everyone was safe. He also thanked God for the clarity of mind and courage of heart that allows a father to do anything to protect his family. Women & children should take solace in that.

A Divorcee’s Reprieve: Life Was Fun Again

September 2, 2019 by admin Leave a Comment

A Divorcee’s Reprieve: Life Was Fun Again

closeup portrait of elegant middle aged woman

My friend attended a seminar for “Alternative Spiritual Support” for Seniors.

One alternative of “Spiritual Support”, was the Buddhist Tonglen Prayer (breathes in pain & suffering and breathes out joy & happiness). An attending, 30-something professional woman, who provided services to seniors, shared the pain & bitterness of her recent divorce with my friend during a “seminar exercise”. The exercise required one attendee to “breathe-in the pain” of the other, and then respond by “breathing- out” joy to the other.

My friend was completely unprepared for this exercise. It wasn’t on the agenda. He came for the free coffee & bagels. Fortunately, he recalled several topics from a Bible Study, and began to spontaneously say:

“I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out that you are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image and likeness of God.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out that the Son of God became man and died for your sins with unconditional love.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out your advocate, the Holy Spirit of peace and joy.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out the awareness of the presence of God within you.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out God’s Will to love Him and others, as Christ loves you.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out the awareness that life is not about you, that the world with one exception (you) is made up of others.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out the rich, fullness of the companionship of God.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out the assurance that companionship of family and friends will comfort you, as an expression of God’s grace, shared by members of “His Mystical Body”, one to another.

I breathe in the sorrow of your heart, and breathe out the assurance that no one and nothing can hurt you, because God is sovereign over all things.

I breathe in the new peace & joy of your heart, and breathe out a “Blessing”: When painful memories trouble your heart, “May God hold you in the Palm of His hand.”

Post Script:

The attending woman requested that my friend write a letter containing what he told her. He assured her that he would. She thanked him, gave him her card with personal contact information, and left, with tears rolling down her cheeks.

Several months later, the divorcee’ wrote to my friend that her family & friends noticed a change in her. She was happy. No more pain, nor tears. There was perceptible joy in her heart. There was fun in her life. She shared my friend’s letter with others who had experienced painful loss. Their responses were similar.

Maybe you can share this letter with someone who experienced the pain of separation.

“Ladder Theology” – Debunked by a Life of Participation

September 2, 2019 by admin Leave a Comment

“Ladder Theology” – Debunked by a Life of Participation

Paul was a devout Jew, who strictly obeyed “The Law”. On the rod to Damascus to arrest more Christians, he was blinded by a bright light and heard a voice say, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” I am Jesus, the Nazorean.” N. B. The pronoun: “Me” was the life-changing distinction. Paul was persecuting people who BELIEVED in Christ. Paul NEVER MET Christ. For Christ to make NO distinction between Himself and those who believed in Christ, was transformational for Paul. Belief in Christ was the same as sharing the life of Christ – the same as Christ being in the life of the believer. That congruity was the basis of Paul’s analogy of the Mystical Body of Christ.

We are acquitted of our sins by belief in Christ’s death. By belief in Christ’s resurrection, we are reconciled into the life of God. As worthless broken branches, we are re-grafted into the life-giving vine of God. As such, God’s love flows though us, to others. That is the wonderful dynamic of the Mystical Body of Christ. God’s unilateral gift of love to one part, is shared with each other part. There is a corporate, cosmic unity to the Mystical Body of Christ.

More incredible, was Christ choosing Paul, a sinner (a hateful murderer), to be His “Apostle to the Gentiles”. Paul understood that he did nothing to deserve that selection, which led to his theme of “Grace”. Grace means free gift. We do nothing to earn it. Grace is not performance based. God loves us as we are – imperfect sinners. Paul states, that our redemption was nothing we earned by keeping Laws (Galatians). Keeping Laws and doing good deeds doesn’t make God love us. God already loves us, so He sent His Son, to reconcile us with Him.

Paul eschews the notion of meritorious “Ladder Theology” – that we climb to heaven by the performance of good deeds and adherence to Laws, to make us worthy of God’s acceptance. Our culture believes in Pavlov’s paradigm: Stimulus /Response / Reward: If we work hard, and produce good results, we get our reward. It’s a quid-pro-quo system based on performance & justice. Christ’s death & resurrection turned that paradigm upside-down. Christ knows we are guilty, and acquits us, anyway. This is counter intuitive to the performance principle. It is God’s unconditional love, not performance & justice that hung on the Cross. Paul acknowledged the guilt and futility of “Ladder Theology” when he wrote, “When I what to do good, I don’t. And when I want to avoid evil, I do it anyway.” – (Romans). Paul’s transformation came from his experience of God’s love, not Paul’s worthiness.

Paul knew that the Old Testaments’ bi-lateral covenants were broken by humanity. Christ’s New Testament covenant is unilateral love. Paul wrote his letters without the benefit of reading the gospels, which were written later. Paul never knew the parable about paying laborers the same for different performance. That’s the Paschal Mystery.

The hardest thing to accept is that God accepts us, as is. God knows we are guilty, then acquits us, by Christ’s death. We become a “new creation” – children of God – heirs to heaven by Christ’s resurrection. As such, we will love God, and others, as much as we allow God to love us. The dynamic of the Mystical Body is to allow the “vertical” love of God to flow “horizontally” through broken vessels to each other, whose love, in turn, flows back to God, and so on and so on. We share God’s love because we want to, not because we have to.

This transformational conversion experience of living “In Christo” results in “suffering and death”. Paul speaks of dying to the old-self. The old-self is selfish. It’s petty, and needy of admiration and affirmation though praise of achievement – through the acquisition of things. The old-self is defined by persons and things outside of itself. It’s fragile, because its validity is determined by changing life situations. Paul turns that cultural notion upside-down. Our value comes from the life of Christ within us. We are made by God, and for God. Until we understand that, life won’t make sense. By dying to selfishness, we experience the presence of God within us, and live “In Christo” – in Eucharist. The “old-self” is powerless against “Powers and Principalities”. The “New Creation” in Christ, triumphs.

Participation in the Mystical Body of Christ is an act of love. It is sharing who we are & what we have, asking nothing in return, to make other lives breathe easier. Easy to say. Hard to do.

Civility, Where Art Thou?

September 1, 2019 by admin Leave a Comment

Civility, Where Art Thou?

My friend is genuinely sad (and frightened for his children & grandchildren) about today’s lack of Civility in our Culture.

Wherever he looks or listens (TV, radio, social media, etc.,) at best, someone is screaming at someone else. At worst, someone is shooting at someone else. The reason for the rage is not some appropriate, self-defense reaction from bodily harm. Rage results because the “Offended” doesn’t agree with the “Offender’s” personal opposing opinion.

Not so long ago, philosophical, religious, or political disagreements were settled over a cup of coffee or beer, with the better merits of the argument determining the outcome of the debate differences. “Res Ipsa Locquitor” – The Facts Speak for Themselves”. Ideas were actually exchanged, pondered, and processed according to the validity of the relevant truth presented. (Senator Moynihan’s astute observation prevailed: “Everyone is entitled to their opinion. NO One is entitled to ignore the facts, or change the facts.”) Hence, the most reasonable argument won.

Unfortunately, today, the facts are routinely ignored or distorted. Baseless statements are made to support an agenda or ideology. Beliefs are based on emotional conviction for desired outcomes, regardless of reality. “Truth” was once called the “Victim of War”. (Because propaganda prevailed on both sides of the combatants.) Propaganda is the spine of today’s cultural beliefs. “Truth” is a discarded fatality, by the depraved indifference of the propaganda machines.

The Genesis of this incivility can be traced to the changes in our nation’s magazine titles from: “Life” to “People” to “Us” to “Self”. Family photos were replaced by “Selfies”. Road rage morphed from “Honking Horn” to “The Finger” to a “Gun”. What once was an annoyance, is now an outrageous offence against some “Victim Status”. “Vitim Status” is the progeny of propaganda, “Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools”. Or, less poetically: Political Lies to curry favor with the less- informed, enchanted by the perfume of promises made (always broken), but blamed on some else. So, Rage is born.

Rage isn’t just aimed at the contrary idea. Rage is also aimed the person expressing the Idea. The offender must be destroyed along with the offensive idea. The counterattack of the idea does not require facts or reason, likewise, the personal destruction of the perpetrator of the opposing idea must be done at all costs, without regard to the Truth, common sense, or common decency. Actually, common decency is an Oxymoron. Decency is no longer common.

Common to our culture are anger, hatred, rage, and vengeance, which combined with ignorance, spite, and victim-hood, are the vile ingredients of a seething cauldron of vicious emotion poured onto an innocent, defenseless society.

“The only thing necessary for the Triumph of Evil, is that Good Men, do nothing.” – Edmund Burke.

Hopefully, there are enough Good Men & Women left to do something. Or, God help us all.