“Success Is Not Final. Failure is Not Fatal.” – Winston Churchill

In addition to his quote in this blog post title, Churchill’s Commencement speech advised college graduates to, “Never, Never, Never, Never, Never Give UP.” Then, he sat down. Churchill’s wisdom mirrors Kipling’s advice in the Poem, “If’: “If you meet with Triumph & Disaster, treat those two imposters, just the same.”

Churchill’s formula for “Success” applies to many human endeavors.

It applies to Our Life’s Purpose described by the diverse observations below. To wit:

• In the song, “Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina”, Andrew Lloyd Weber had Evita sing, “Fortune & Fame are not the solutions they promised to They are illusions.”
• Solomon, who tasted all the world’s pleasures & treasures, concluded, “ All is Vanity.”
• Job, in pain & loss, sitting on a dunghill, on the outskirts of town, with his wife & friends jeering him, said, “God knows me.” And, “My Redeemer lives.’
• In prison, Paul wrote, “I consider everything so much rubbish, that I might gain Christ.”

Clearly, Treasure, Pleasure, and Fame are transient things. Requiring more, more often, to satisfy a fragile ego, pandering to the Social Mores du jour. Fueled by the gratuitous gravitational forces of Pride, Lust Greed, etc. that fester in the soft underbelly of our humanity. That’s the “Opium of the Masses.” And Not, Religion, which Marx labeled.

The word “Religion” comes from 2 Latin words, “Re Ligo” – “To Link Again”. Religion “links again” our relationship with the peace & joy of the companionship of God. We were made in the “Image and Likeness of God” to be “Children of God” & “Heirs to Heaven”.

But Adam sinned (turned away from God’s companionship), and the perfect relationship with God was broken. So, God sent His Son, Jesus, to become man, and suffer & die on the Cross, to re-graft His “Broken Branches” into the “Living Vine”. Then, the original relationship with God was restored.

The sanctuary of our soul experiences the presence of God within it, by simply accepting that God loves us “As Is”. And accordingly, we will love God & others, asking nothing in return.

“Religion” is Not choosing the “Correct One” of the thousands of Christian Denominations, or Islam, or Catholicism, or Buddhism, or any Other “Ism” claiming to be the “Only Way” to know the will of God, by adherence to their Creeds, or keeping commandments, or doing good deeds.

The “Re-Linking” of the relationship with God is an Experience. A Mystical Experience. Well beyond any human enterprise. (“We don’t have a soul. We are a Soul. We have a body.” – C. S. Lewis). It’s our Soul’s Spirit experiencing the infinite Love of God. Reflecting that Love back to God & Others is the gyroscope for our Soul. We will keep Commandments and do Good Deeds by reflecting God’s Love.

The Successful restoration of our Soul’s relationship with God is Not Final: Our flawed Humanity will sin, again and again. But our Failure is Not Fatal: No sin, no matter how vile or frequent, can exceed the forgiveness, of the welcoming embrace, of the outstretched arms, of the Redemptive Cross: “Father forgive them for they no not what they do.” So, “Never, Never, Never, Never, Never Give Up.”

We can repent again and again, “creating in us a new clean heart”. Then, our heart will lie peaceful & calm, when it’s laid to its rest, experiencing the Peace & Joy of the Companionship of God, forever.

My Friend’s 49th Wedding Anniversary Card – Thru the LYRICS of 19 Music Videos

My friend was Unable to find a Hallmark Card that expressed the flood of his feelings during his 1-year courtship, 6-month engagement, and 49-year marriage. He was Able to find the LYRICS to 19 Music Videos that captured the essence of the significant moments of their 50-year relationship.

Here’s my friend’s 49^th Wedding Anniversary Card – thru the LYRICS of 19 music videos:

Dear Jane,

The 1st time we met was on a blind date, on New Year’s Eve, December 31^st, 1970. I knew then, that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. You never wanted to see me again. My feelings then, are best expressed thru the Lyrics of the following 2 music videos:

But you decided to go to Ponte Vedra, Florida to teach school with your friend, Mary Jude. I had to fly down once a month, on weekends, make daily phone calls, and write weekly letters with Shakespearean Sonnets to disperse the swarm of hard-bodied beach boys swirling around you. I needed to remind you to save the last dance for me:

Because only you can make this change in me. “For it’s true, you are my destiny. Only you and you alone can thrill me like you do, and fill my heart with love, only you”:

I offered to drive you to your parents’ home in Burlington when you arrived at the Milwaukee Airport, for Christmas Break. I had a Major Out-of-Body Experience (I heard sounds, not words) when I saw you depart from the ramp. You were so Breathtakingly Beautiful.

When we were walking down the concourse, I felt a ring box in my pocket that I picked up after work. I had planned a romantic proposal on the Sunday before Christmas, at the Les Cargot restaurant, where we 1^st met. During brunch, we could gaze beyond the horizon of Lake Michigan, and dream, dreams. Then, I could kneel beside your chair, and propose, “Would you give me the best Christmas Gift ever, by marring me?”

Instead, I shoved my arm in front of you, opened my hand, and said, “Here”. The next thing I knew was that we were sitting in your parent’s living room, with you showing them the dazzling ring on your finger, saying, “We’re engaged.” (The following music video explains my impulsive behavior.):

You decided to marry me on May 6^th, 1972, in Burlington, WI – “For better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.” (The wedding vows are a reflection of Whitney Houston’s lyric’s):

Truly, May 6^th, 1972 was the real-life version of “Beauty & the Beast”:

On our Honeymoon – St. Thomas, Virgin Islands – May 1972: We sailed on the same boat, “True Love”, as in the Movie with Bing Crosby & Grace Kelly, “Wishing that our Guardian Angels had nothing to do.”:

During the next 49 years I tried my best to be your bridge over troubled waters:

I wanted you to know that you had a friend, and you would never have to walk alone.

While raising a family of 4 kids, you also raised me up

Through it all, you were the wind beneath my wings:

After 49 years of, “For better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health”, we’re still “rolling along, singing a song, side by side”:

Now, we are in the Autumn of our years, with 4 children & 5 grandchildren, when tomorrow is promised to no one. So, let’s make another Vow to each other: “That our hearts will go on.”

Like the 2 Ice Dancers: The Man, Strong & Supportive. The Woman, Loving & Trusting. Dancing Harmoniously, whether together or apart, always as One…Forever.

After all, “You don’t have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.” – C. S. Lewis.

Love is Not, “Until death do us part”. Love is Timeless…Forever. One day, one of us will sing to the other:

Our priceless legacy about “Life & Love”, left to our children & grandchildren, is: “Make someone happy. Make just one someone happy. And you will be happy, too.”:

Happy 49^th Anniversary, Jane

All of that happened because we simply asked each other to, “Love me, that’s all I ask of you.”

Love,

Paul XO

PS Perhaps, I should have spent more time looking for a Hallmark Card.

Sometimes a Father Needs to be a Defense Lawyer

My friend’s wife & daughter spent a day looking for an apartment for their daughter’s senior year in college. They found a perfect place with 2 large bedrooms & bathrooms that would well serve 4 girl roommates, for 2 semesters. The rent was reasonable. So, they signed a 1-year lease and paid the required one month’s Security Deposit. The apartment manager also signed the lease and gave them a copy, along with a receipt of their payment. Done deal. Mother & daughter were excited.

Until the manager called the next day, saying that their apartment was rented to someone else. Sorry. My friend called the manger back. Now it was the manager’s turn to feel sorry.

My friend reminded the manager that he held a State Regulated Realtor License. That License has very clear & strict Ethical Requirements. Ethics violations are severely frowned upon, resulting in heavy fines, suspension or loss of License, even possible jail time. My friend then quoted the specific State Statutory Sanctions for his ethic violations.

The irrefutable facts were that the signed lease by both parties and the payment & acceptance of the required earnest money constituted a valid contract: the mutual meeting of the minds and consideration.

The manager was mute when my friend stopped talking. The silence lingered like the stench of death over a slaughter house. Finally, the manager said that he would review the matter, and get back to my friend.

In the interim, my friend contacted 2 of his daughter’s, roommates’ fathers. One was a prominent local physician. The other, a wealthy New York Real Estate investor. Both were more furious than my friend, when they heard that the apartment manager reneged on the deal. Their daughters were very excited about the apartment that my friend’s daughter described to them. Some Shyster Manager wasn’t going to screw their daughters out of a “Done Deal”.

The Above YouTube music video confirms that a father will do anything for his little Girl (regardless of her age)

Both fathers said that they would call that apartment manager. This was far from over. Each father called my friend back, and told him what they said to that manager. First, they convinced the manager that were men of some stature, resources, and connections. Secondly, they would apply the full measure of their collective capacity to get that rightful apartment back for their daughters.

Each father relished telling my friend their delight in envisioning that manager squirm as he realized that he picked a fight with the wrong hombres. That manager was stammering and sputtering apologies with each breath. He assured each of those fathers that he would rectify the situation.

The Above Music Video Describes That Fathers Are Willing “To Fight the Unbeatable Foe”, For Their Daughters

The manager called my friend the next day. He said that there was a misunderstanding. My friend’s daughter and her roommates would definitely have the apartment described in their lease. Furthermore, the first month’s rent was free. And he was applying the Security Deposit to their last month’s rent. And if they found anything not to their satisfaction after they moved in, to please call his Direct Phone #, and that he would personally rectify the situation, immediately.

My friend said, “Thank you,” My friend’s wife & daughter were ecstatic when they heard the news. Both of the other fathers involved savored the restoration of joy & excitement for their daughters. They also enjoyed squashing that low-life twerp. Perhaps, he will think twice before trying to screw someone else’s daughter.

He certainly learned that fathers could be effective lawyers in defense of their daughters, using just a phone.

The Benefit of the Coronavirus is…

While my friend was quarantined by Federal & State mandates, he had time to think about the intense focus on “Life”. Everywhere: “Social Media”, TV, and newspapers. People were concerned about preserving “Life”.

The term “Social Distancing” established a 6-foot protective radius between people. “Self-quarantine” meant only leaving home for food & medicine. Washing hands & cleaning everything with disinfectant-wipes became standard operating procedures. We closed our borders. We closed our businesses. We closed our homes. No one went out. Life was cherished beyond everything else. The distinction is the motive.

Many did those things with the noble intention to protect others from this deadly virus. While others were only concerned about their own life, self-preservation.

That difference regarding “Life” was reflected in our Culture before the Coronavirus.  Half of Americans demanded that a woman could end the life of the baby in her womb. Two states allowed a woman to kill a perfectly healthy, born baby, if her planned abortion failed. That’s not cherishing “Life”. But, half of the politicians allow it to protect their “Votes”.

Drug dealers killed thousands every year to protect their “Turf”. And thousands of drug users die in hope of a higher, “High”. 90% of the drugs for dealers & users flow into the United States across the Southern Border. Yet, half of our politicians don’t want to close our Southern Border to protect the life of “Drug Virus” victims. Because they want the “Votes” that come along with the drugs & violence.

Major cities allow homeless people to defecate in public streets, where they also discard their broken, drug needles. Major cities provide “Sanctuary” protection to known, convicted murderers & sex offenders. Politicians allow this degradation of life to raise money for “Votes”.

“O Tempiora. O Mores.” (O Times. O Customs) wrote Seneca, centuries ago, before the fall of Rome. One can’t imagine the title of his essay describing the hypocrisy concerning the differences toward “Life” outlined above: Doing everything for “Self-Preservation”, but nothing to protect the “Life of Others”. It’s hypocrisy beyond computation.

Its creed is, “What’s in it for me” – as described by our magazine titles morphing from “Life” to “People” to “Us” to “Self”. How sad. We ignore the toxins of selfishness, because we enjoy its perfume. The antidote to the fatal virus of selfishness is the conviction to remove the barriers to love from our hearts. It takes Time:

• To remove self-reliance as the answer to our security & success.
• To remove prejudice, to recognize that others are made in the image and likeness of God.
• To accept the counter-intuitive notion of Love – sharing what we have with others, asking nothing in return.

Then, the vacuum. created by the removal of that dross, that festers in the soft underbelly of humanity, will be filled with love.

Some steps from the transformation of selfishness to love are provided by Mother Theresa:

“If you are honest, people may deceive you. Be honest anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of being selfish (manipulative). Be kind anyway.
All the good that you do will be forgotten by others tomorrow. Do good anyway.
What you create others can destroy. Create anyway.
Because in the end, it’s between you and God.
It was never between you and anyone else. Anyway.”

Or, what Christ simply stated: “Love one another, as I (Christ) love you.”

• Love has no conditions.
• Surrenders the need to be right.
• Is concerned that “other lives breathe easier” – Emerson.

In summary, “Love is all you need” – Beetles. Many Americans practice the “Love of Others”.

Perhaps, the benefit of the Coronavirus is to squash selfishness in some, to recognize that: “All we need is Love.”