Making a Difference

A child was walking along a beach, when he saw a starfish washed-up on the sand. The child picked-up the starfish and threw it back into the sea. An adult witnessed what the child had done. He told the child, “There are hundreds of starfish washed-up on this beach. What difference did it make to throw one back into the sea?”

The child replied, “It made a difference to that one.”

The child intuitively knew the meaning of Christ’s parable about the Good Shepherd, leaving the flock of 99, to search for the one, lost sheep. The child understood Emerson’s verse about “Success”; “To know that even one life breathed easier, because you lived.” The child taught the adult the lesson, “Not to forsake the good, in search of the perfect.”

My friend was asked to join the local High School’s Booster Club’s Board of Directors. The school needed to raise an additional $45,000 to expand the stadium seating for both the football and soccer stadiums. It had to raise that remainder within the next 6 weeks to take advantage of a very low-cost construction project. All the usual large donors had given, along with all the Booster Club members.

The Booster Club Board was distraught & desperate. Hence, they asked my friend to find different, additional channels of donation. My friend asked if the Non-Booster Club High School parents were contacted. Blank stares surrounded the table. The Board members assumed that they wouldn’t be interested because they didn’t join the Booster Club at the beginning of the year.

My friend volunteered to write a letter to All Non Booster Club  Parents. The letter would stress “Make a Difference”:

“Previous Booster Clubs paid for the Stadium Lights and the Concession Stand. This is your chance to tell your children and grandchildren, “I helped build that stadium.”  Your $35 bucks will make a difference. It will provide the additional seating for parents & grandparents to watch their children play Football & Soccer. Your 35 Bucks will make a difference, to provide Treasured Memories.”

My friend got permission from the School District Superintendent to send letters to ALL High School parents asking for $35, snd to All Middle School parents asking for $20, and to All Grade School parents asking for $10. All of those letters stressed that the small amount given “Made a Difference”.

This YouTube music video portrays The Difference One Man Makes Against All Odds.

One-month letter, the Booster Club Treasurer reported that when he went to the Club’s Post Office Box, it was empty. Except for a note to see the postal clerk behind the counter. The clerk handed the Club’s Treasurer bags of mail, like the scene in the movie, “Miracle on 34^th Street”.

The Treasurer reported to the Board that there were many $10, $20, and $35 checks in the bags. There were also checks for $100, $500, and $1,000. The checks totaled over $55,000. The contract was signed and the expanded Stadium Seating was built. The seats were filled for every game.

Too often, opportunities are missed to make a difference in someone’s life. A pat on the back, a kind word, or thanks for a favor make a difference, like that small boy tossing a starfish back into the ocean. A small check seems insignificant, but the accumulation of many can construct something beautiful & great.

The Above YouTube Music Video Captures the Essence of this Blog Post”s Message

The accumulation of kindness can make all the difference in someone’s life. Make a difference.

“Know that even one life breathed easier, because you lived.” – like the child throwing one starfish  back into the sea.

Being Judgmental Can be a Sledgehammer or a Scalpel

My friend astutely observed that being “Judgmental” can be a Sledgehammer or a Scalpel.

Today, our culture uses the term “Judgmental” as a sledgehammer. Any assessment of one person toward another is bad – unkind, at best, despicable, at worst. Unfortunately, our culture is half-right.

Certainly, the arbitrary labeling of someone, based upon a difference of opinion, intended to hurt, with no correction for the better, is bad, unkind, and despicable. However, an accurate assessment of destructive behavior, that needs to be corrected for the good of the person and society, is a life-saving scalpel. That distinction with a difference is lost on today’s culture. Hence, labeling all judgment as bad.

As a result, “troubled students”, that desperately need medical & emotional intervention, simply revolve between the classroom and the Principal’s Office, without getting the help they need. No one wants to be “Judgmental” and tarnish the students’ self-esteem.

Then we are shocked. Shocked! When a disturbed student enters a school and kills a dozen innocent people. We blame the guns because it is expedient and fashionable. But, we don’t blame ourselves for not making the proper “Judgement”, that would have helped that student, and saved a dozen lives.

The Above YouTube Music Video Captures the Essence of being “Judgmental”, without Knowing the Person, is a “Sledgehammer”.

Making an honest, accurate assessment of the reality of destructive behavior, and making the proper caring solution to resolve the disturbed motivation, is in the best interest of the particular person, and society as a whole. Then, being judgmental is a life-saving scalpel.

Troubled children are not a new phenomenon. In Socrates’ day, youth, called “Contrarians”, actually walked backwards. Seneca’s essay, “O Tempora! O Mores!” chronicled the disturbing behavior of Roman youth. Our refusal to identify and treat the real problem, because we eschew being “Judgmental”, is “New.”

If we cannot recognize, despise, and destroy evil, then we are lost. Edmund Burke warned, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil, is that good men do nothing.”

Equally sinister, is our forsaking the “good”, in search of the “perfect”. Ironically, this is the reciprocal-inverse of an honest, accurate “judgment”. For example, we chastise the “Founding Fathers” for owning slaves, while ignoring their historical brilliance for the establishment of a government, “Of the people, by the people, and for the people” to provide “Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness”.

We diminish Lincoln’s integrity and courage to fight a Civil War over the “Emancipation Proclamation”, freeing the slaves our forefathers forgot, because aspects of prejudice lingered for over a century later.

Our culture is equally wrong’ by ignoring the good of our forefathers, and incorrectly labeling others today as “Judgmental” for recognizing evil and attempting to correct it.

Maybe, our culture can rectify its errors about being “Judgmental”: Use the life-saving scalpel of caring, honest judgment to help others, and society as a whole.

Th Above YouTube Music Video Captures the Essence of the Blog Post Message Above

Innocent lives depend on it.

                                                     

Thanksgiving – Then & Now

My friend’s blog post was published as a “Letter to the Editor” in our Community Newspaper on Thanksgiving Day, 2018. It was in response to an article about President Roosevelt’s Proclamation of “Thanksgiving Day”, referencing Presidents Washington’s and Lincoln’s gratitude for God’s Blessings on America.

My friend read President Roosevelt’s Proclamation to his family as they sat down for their Thanksgiving Day dinner.

Each family member was experiencing something different: from medical & physical challenges to athletic achievement. From job loss to career advancement. From a sparse apartment to a large home.

Yet, each one was grateful for God’s blessings, because each one understood the defenseless random occurrence of the “Slings & Arrows of Outrageous Fortune”, to which no one is immune.

“If you can meet with Triumph & Disaster, and treat those two imposters just the same”, then you can enjoy a Genuine Thanksgiving Day, that will make you SMILE.

 

free you tube music video “Smile” : – Yahoo Video Search Results

 

Isn’t it odd:

That George Washington, presiding over a nation wobbling on the newborn legs of Freedom and Democracy, would proclaim for citizens, to thank God for their blessings midst the political turmoil of divided allegiance?

That Abraham Lincoln, presiding over a nation torn-in-two by those Not believing that ALL men are created equal, would proclaim for citizens to thank “Our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the heavens”, for their blessings, midst the harvest of war’s carnage, on once pristine farm fields?

That Franklin D. Roosevelt, presiding over a nation crushed by economic job-less depression, would proclaim for citizens to thank God for their blessings, midst the brutal poverty of the homeless, starving, and sick? Roosevelt would remind citizens that “Americans have thanked God for their blessings. In our deepest natures. In our very souls, we turn to God in times of trouble and in times of happiness.”?

That from those days, at almost 70-year intervals, to this day, almost 70 years later, Our Culture dragged God out of our marketplaces & our homes, to worship instead, at the altar of door-buster gizmos and gadgets and other self-indulgent stuff to satisfy our wants.

Washington, Lincoln, and Roosevelt thought that we should be Thankful for what we have, midst strife.

The above music video expresses the essence of what Thanksgiving Day means.

Happy Thanksgiving.

 

Get Me to the Church on Time

My friend was chosen to be the “Best Man” at his best friend’s wedding.

The future groom insisted on having his Bachelor Party on the night before his Wedding Day, just like in the scene, “Get Me to the Church on Time” in the movie, “My Fair Lady”. (The wedding was in 1971)

My friend suggested a gentlemanly dinner in his apartment (catered of course). A generous “Cocktail Hour” would provide whatever beverages the groomsmen desired. The menu items for the 8-course meal would be selected by the groom. There would be NO strippers, NO porn videos. This was going to be a dignified celebration by mid-20’s, college educated, professional men. Most went through high school together; all went to college together.

No one needed to prove anything to anyone. Everyone was looking forward to an enjoyable evening of dinner & drinks, with some clever conversation. Except the groom. He waited for a while after dinner, and then mentioned that he wanted to visit his favorite college bar. Everyone agreed that it would be a great place to reminisce.

The bar had a small, but faithful clientele. A glass of beer cost 50 cents, a shot of booze – $1 buck, in 1971. Fortunately, my friend had stopped at the bank earlier and had several hundred dollars in his wallet. Everyone knew the owner, Kenny, who was also the bartender. My friend gave Kenny $100 and everyone drank for free. (The groomsmen party doubled the number of customers, when they walked in.) Everybody was having a good time.

Then, “Crazy George”, a groomsman whose name is an understatement, introduced “Amergutes” – A shot of Brandy, with Peppermint Schnapps floated on top. It seemed harmless enough. The sweet, low-proof Peppermint Schnapps deceives the tongue, while the 85-proof Brandy sneaks by, entering the blood going right into the brain. The onslaught of drunkenness is exacerbated by the manner & frequency of drinking “Amergutes”:

Shot-glasses of Brandy, with Peppermint Schnapps, were lined up in front of each groomsmen. Then, each one would pound the bar 3 times in unison, with the palm of their hand, while shouting 1 – 2 – 3, and pour the entire drink down their throat. It would only take Kenny a few minutes to reload the devious concoction in their shot-glasses. The synchronized pounding on the bar would begin, in concert to the screaming of 1 – 2 – 3, heads would tilt back as the sweet “Amergutes” teased the tongue, while the demon booze befuddled the brain.

Soon, the entire bar was drinking “Amergutes”. My friend had given Kenny another $100. “Crazy George” thought it necessary to ignite the alcohol in his shot glass and began drinking “Flaming Gutes”. It was an amazing sight & sound. A few “Flaming Gutes”, like flickering candle light, enticing everyone to pound the bar, chant in unison, tilt their heads back, and down the destruction of many a young man.

It didn’t take long for someone to be standing on the bar, and flapping his arms, like a bird. Others sang the refrain to “Hey Jude”, endlessly. Some played a semblance of Foosball. Everyone burst through the door of the Devil’s Playhouse. Pandemonium reigned. Until, Kenny announced that he was out of booze & beer. A dazed silence of disbelief filled the air.

The above YouTube music video expresses the essence of the blog post story

That sobering news had an immediate debilitating effect on the groomsmen. The stumbling, motley crew couldn’t make it to the cars. My friend was a responsible “Best Man”. He only had 3 drinks all night. My friend literally dragged the Groom, and 2 other guys,  into his car. He then dragged each one from his car into the Groom’s home, dropping them in the foyer.

He went back to the bar for the remaining 3. He found one on the bar floor, one on the sidewalk, and the 3^rd slumped over the front seat of his convertible, with the top down, and raindrops falling on his head. My friend dumped those 3 groomsmen on top of the pile of the others in the Groom’s foyer. It was the morning of the Groom’s Wedding Day.

My friend returned to the Groom’s home a few hours later, to get that drunken gaggle of groomsmen sobered-up for the Wedding. He found the Groom & the 5 other groomsmen, still lying in the foyer where he dumped them earlier. My friend managed to get the Groom, and everyone else, “To the Church on Time”.

My friend vowed to himself, never to be part of a “Bachelor Party” like that again, especially for his Own Wedding.

Never. Ever.

Stay Tuned: For he blog post of My Friend’s Bachelor Party, one year later: “The Best Laid Plans of Mice & Men”